I am from planet Bjork...

Why do I have the strange feeling that neither of those two

were involved in the creation of that child?

But He's A Fag!

Okay so Katie's out of town and he's playin' around. But he's gay, I mean at least he's fondling someone's ball!

Watch me find out that's his sister or some shit!

When did he grow titties?

Anyway, I say he's gay so I'm sure this is a casual shot of him with some chick, because while she's away he's gonna screw Travolta or some shit, not a lady!

Horrible Couple, Worse Boots.

Lame. He needs to just come out the goddamn closet!

Bull-Motherfucking-Shit!

So there's a baby, and like the baby, I will believe that there is a wedding AFTER I see pictures.

Woah! Suri May Actually Be Tom Cruise's Baby.

So I figure if I didn't put pictures of Suri on here ASAP I'd be a shitty celebrity blogger...

ta-da. It scares me to say, I think that she actually resembles Tom.

She's a cutie, but now, why was she in hiding for so long?!?

How Lame is Tom Cruise?

While he is under fire for acting like a person in need of some serious psychotropic medication, he apologizes to Brooke Shields. Too little, too fucking late, you fag.

See What Lindsay's Father Started... A Maelstrom I Tell Ya.

Katie Holmes: Get out while it's still safe. And take your alien baby.

Gay of the Day!

Tom Cruise.

I am so very suri about this.

Tom Cruise's "Conduct" Comes Back to Kick Him the Ass.

ABC reports:

Aug. 22, 2006 — A Wall Street Journal story released late today said Paramount Pictures is terminating its 14-year relationship with Tom Cruise, in part because of the actor's erratic behavior over the past year.
"As much as we like him personally, we thought it was wrong to renew his deal," Viacom Inc. Chairman Sumner Redstone told The Wall Street Journal. "His recent conduct has not been acceptable to Paramount."
Viacom is the parent company of Paramount.
Cruise, one of the most successful movie stars of all time, has starred in "Top Gun," "Rain Man" and three "Mission: Impossible" movies. The Journal story says the actor's moviemaking company, Cruise/Wagner Productions, has been located on the Paramount lot since 1992.
But increasingly unusual behavior during the past year, including a famous stint jumping on Oprah Winfrey's couch while explaining his relationship with actress Katie Holmes, has drawn questionable reactions from the press and public. Cruise has also become increasingly vocal about his involvement with the controversial Church of Scientology.
The Journal story said Paramount believes that Cruise's behavior hurt box-office receipts of the most recent "Mission: Impossible" movie, which was released in May.
A spokeswoman for Cruise/Wagner Productions declined to comment on the Journal story.

Suri's stroller my ass.

That's a fucking prop people. Don't fall for this shit.

South Park-Closet

I LOVE IT!!!!!!

I still don't believe that Suri exists.

... Although I love www.tmz.com for getting their hands on this "official" birth certificate document.

And, uh, he's still a big 'mo.

The Suri Conspiracy.

There is no baby fathered by Tom Cruise. Let's just peruse through the facts.

Marriage #1: Mimi Rogers - no kids.

Marriage #2: Nicole Kidman - 2 kids, both adopted.

He can't have children. A sad but true fact.

He's gay. He should just get over it - everyone else has.

Suri may be Katie's, but the father is someone else. If it weren't for those shots of her stretch marks, I'd be buying into the whole 'it's a pillow' thing.