I am from planet Bjork...

Why do I have the strange feeling that neither of those two

were involved in the creation of that child?

Woah! Suri May Actually Be Tom Cruise's Baby.

So I figure if I didn't put pictures of Suri on here ASAP I'd be a shitty celebrity blogger...

ta-da. It scares me to say, I think that she actually resembles Tom.

She's a cutie, but now, why was she in hiding for so long?!?

Suri's stroller my ass.

That's a fucking prop people. Don't fall for this shit.

I still don't believe that Suri exists.

... Although I love www.tmz.com for getting their hands on this "official" birth certificate document.

And, uh, he's still a big 'mo.

The Suri Conspiracy.

There is no baby fathered by Tom Cruise. Let's just peruse through the facts.

Marriage #1: Mimi Rogers - no kids.

Marriage #2: Nicole Kidman - 2 kids, both adopted.

He can't have children. A sad but true fact.

He's gay. He should just get over it - everyone else has.

Suri may be Katie's, but the father is someone else. If it weren't for those shots of her stretch marks, I'd be buying into the whole 'it's a pillow' thing.