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Saturday, August 12, 2006

Marilyn Manson Still Scares Me.

I Wanna Be in the Middle!

What I would do to be in a Ryan Phillippe Channing Tatum sandwich.
Oh dear lord.

I Just Threw Up All The Fondue I had For Dinner.

This is Janice Dickinson. And this is not a joke.
Bitch needs to do us all (and herself) a favor and never leave her house lookin' all a mess like this again.

Some Afternoon Deliciousness.

I love me some boys.

How Fucking Cute!

Rocco is so cute.... Daddy ain't so bad himself. Cheery-o.

I Only Dream of Being That Close to Johnny Knoxville's Ass.

I have such a crush on him. He looks like a filthy whore in the sack and I love it...

PerezHilton is Such A Starfucker.

And I am so fucking jealous. Bitch better not lay a hand on my Paves.
What's with the betty on the left, is Perez sticking his finger up her ass or something?

Friday, August 11, 2006

A Whore Wears Panties.

Fuck you Sienna Miller.
Have I ever mentioned how much I hate the word panties? It's up there on the list with fiance.
Those words give me the clap.

Does She Dress Like A Goon on Purpose?

Or is Kelly Osbourne on the smack again?

Jesus Take The Headband.

Stephen Baldwin is a tool. He's born again. Born again what, is my question.
I own Threesome, enough said.
That's all we need, another B-list celeb who found Jesus.

Dreamgirls AKA Destiny's Child.

Move over bitches, Beyonce always takes center stage.

That's One Long Ass Finger Jodie.

Jodie Foster shows us the finger that she used on Elizabeth Berkeley when they bumped into each other in the West Village.

Posh Spice is the Yoko Ono of Soccer.

David Beckham gets the boot and it's all that alien's fault. Bitch, eat something.

La Lo's Boobs Explode!

La Lo is trying to look all hard and street with that face on her. But those titties, Jesus H!

Dear God, WTF is that? A piece of grape bubble gum?

Lauryn, what the fuck are you smoking - please, stop the insanity!!!

Oh thank GOD! For a second I really thought I was going back in the closet....

Thank God I'm Gay.

I'm Attracted to Women Today.

Rosario Dawson is hot. I'd tap that ass.
WTF is wrong with me. Holy sexual identity confusion.

"My Man 5-0, I Don't See Him In Da Club, 'Cuz He's Out in CT, With a Dick in His Butt" Says Lil' Kim

50 Cent is the perfect example of what internalized homophobia is.
Take notes, kids.

Kanye West Gets a Beard.

People reports:
Rapper and producer Kanye West is engaged, several sources have confirmed to PEOPLE exclusively.
West, 29, proposed to his girlfriend, Alexis, while overseas for two weeks recently, sources close to the singer tell PEOPLE.
Alexis, whose last name and occupation were not immediately available, was West's girlfriend prior to his October 2002 car accident, one source says.
A rep for West had no comment. This will be the first marriage for the Grammy winner.
West began his rise to fame as a producer for Roc-a-Fella Records, where he gained notice for his work on Jay-Z's 2001 album The Blueprint. He has also produced hits for artists including Ludacris and Alicia Keys.
But his career was nearly derailed by a near-fatal car accident in 2002, which inspired the single "Through the Wire" from his 2004 debut album, The College Dropout.
That record earned Grammys for best rap album and best rap song, and during his acceptance speech West thanked the car accident, saying it made him realize that, "If you have the opportunity to play this game called life, you have to appreciate every moment."
His second album, 2005's Late Registration, won Grammy awards for best rap album, best rap song and best rap solo performance.

I'd Hit That...

US Magazine quoted:
“You know, I was kind of weird when I was a kid. And I’ve been told that as an adult I can be very unsettling. And I know the way I look is not normal too. But I kind of like it.”
- Christina Ricci

Lou Diamond Phillips Hits Women.

TMZ reports:
TMZ has learned that actor Lou Diamond Phillips was arrested early Friday morning for alleged domestic violence.

Police were called to a home in Northridge, Calif. around 2:00 a.m. and found Phillips and his live-in girlfriend in an argument. The couple had apparently gotten into a heated verbal disagreement that escalated and allegedly became physical. Phillips was arrested and taken to the Devonshire police station where he is currently being held on $50,000 bail. The name of the woman was not released.

Phillips is perhaps best known for his portrayal of 50's teen idol Ritchie Valens in "La Bamba" and has most recently been seen on NBC's "Law & Order: SVU" and various other TV guest star appearances.

TMZ is awaiting comment and more information from Phillips' rep.

Is That a Jumper?

Hideous outfit, but it hides the STD's well.

Dina Lohan Must Be Smoking Angel Dust.

I can't breathe. Something about a talk show, being the white Oprah and a holiday record. Jesus, take the wheel.
Star Magazine reports:
"I have a talk show in the works," ravishing Dina told Star's David Caplan during an interview at NYC's Tainted Blue recording studios, where daughter Ali, 12, was recording tracks to her holiday-themed album Lohan Holiday, to be released by YMC Records on Oct. 10. "It's more of an Apprentice-y, game show-y thing. I would host it and co-produce it. It's a good heartwarming show. It's nothing trashy. We're not going to follow dates to bars and see what happens, or anything like that. But it's a girl-empowered, woman show. I would only do something that would help other people, because that's just who I am and how I was raised."
But is it a reality show? "I don't want to say that word, but it is about real people," Dina says, without explaining much more about the show."
Please America, for the greater good fo the world - don't let Dina have her own shit.

Lunatics In The Street, Gotta Keep The Heat

Click on the ads and help me become rich.
PS, In case I haven't mentioned this before, I NEED to Meet Lil' Kim.
Anybody wanna help make that happen?
Peace, bitches.

Thursday, August 10, 2006

This Bitch Is So Dumb.

Paris Hilton sucks and her sister looka like a man.


Sandra Bonehard scares me. I have a slight aversion to Lesbians. They intimidate me a little.

You're In Big Trouble Mister.

Why does Uncle Jessie look so disturbed?
Maybe it's because Bob Saget has smelly B.O.
Seeing Mr. Saget always reminds me of high school.
I knew you'd ask why.
Well, way back then I dated this girl (I know, horrible/hysterical), we'll call her Cary (I think she's a lesbo, so we'll call it even).
Cary's brother was getting married and so we went down to Maryland. At the rehearsal dinner, a female friend of her brother's told me I looked like Bob Saget.
That was the night I almost beat a bitch.
How fucked up is that?
I'd rather shit twice and die before I look like Bob Saget.

Darling, This Is ALL Wrong.

Beyonce Knowles, 49, looks horrible. This isn't sexy. She needs like a drug addiction or an eating disorder or something to spice her up. I'm yawning.

Neither Sexy, Nor Back.

J Timba is not looking hot here.
In fact, he is looking like he had a rough night.
Hopefully he was giving Cammie that much needed facial to clear up her skin.

Navarro & Jameson.

Hmmm. Interesting. And I thought he was going to come out.
I guess I was wrong.
Yes, I do think that almost everyone is gay...or at least a little gay.

I Still Think That BKA (Brandy Killed Aaliyah).

It's my theory only. No one else has to believe me, but I still think she had something to do with taking that plane down.
And don't come running to me when you hear that tinfoil and a cellphone were involved.

I'm So Suri.

But even if this really is Suri - even if she does really exist, there is no way I will ever believe that Tom Cruise is the father.

Dude Alert!

Tyra is joining the ranks of ladies that looka like a man.

Goddamn, he's hot.

WTF happened to Val Kilmer. He looks like shit. Suck that in honey.

Yummy shots of the day.

Jakey poo.

Still searching for my Gay Lachey. Any offers?

Mischa Farton.

What's with the this picture. Who's the 'mo she's hangin' on to?
What is wrong with her???

If You Can't Take The Heat, Get The Fuck Out The Kitchen.

Poor Lindsay Lohan. Rumors of getting kicked out of Chateau Marmot, allegations of being a lying bitch on movie sets, and being stalked.
Do yourself a favor, go to rehab. Fire your mother, and stop releasing music.
It ain't easy being at the top. I should know.
US Weekly reports:
August 10, 2006 -- LINDSAY Lohan's wild ways are not just affecting her career - her partying may get her booted from her posh L.A. home base, the Chateau Marmont.

"They are trying to kick her out. It is very disruptive with all of her friends coming in and out and her late nights," said a source. Another insider added, "Even for the Chateau, it is too much." But a rep for the famed hotel to the stars sniffed, "Not true."

Meanwhile, a crew member from Lohan's 2005 flick, "Herbie: Fully Loaded," has anonymously posted a letter on that supports Morgan Creek's laments about Lohan's dubious work ethic.

On July 26, Morgan Creek, producers of Lohan's latest flick, "Georgia Rule," delivered a scathing letter to Lohan telling her to stop partying and calling in sick or they would sue. The new note from the "Herbie" crew member claims, "Her behavior [on 'Georgia Rule'] is exactly the same inconsiderate [bleep] she pulled on the 'Herbie' production.

"She stayed out all night, and then the doctor announced that Ms. Lohan had asthma the next day. She played the exhaustion card a couple of times . . . She called in sick one day and . . . she is across town [spending] a day with her then-boyfriend [Wilmer Valderrama] of 'That '70s Show.' "

The "Herbie" insider continues, "Another day she has the 'doctor' call in Ms. Sickie's fake ailment, because she was shooting her own music video the night before . . . The Princess was able to make the production [crew] re-create the desert race sets closer to the Four Seasons [hotel]. She said she had signed on 'to do a film in Los Angeles' and El Mirage was too hot and too far. She is a brat."

Leslie Sloane Zelnik, Lohan's hardworking rep, raged, "Until this person goes on the record like the producers of Morgan Creek did and attaches a face and name to their charges, I am not going to reply. Stop hiding behind blind anonymity!"

Lohan pals hope her new beau, Harry Morton, will have a "calming" effect on her. A friend of Morton says he's a "sober, nice guy. He doesn't drink or do drugs and actually has a day job and works very hard."

Wednesday, August 09, 2006

Happy Birthday Whitney.

What is she like 62 now?
Crack is cheap, crack is whack.

OMG, he's checking out his daughter's tits.

Something is very off with Joe Simpson. Us Weekly reports:
Joe Simpson has often displayed boundary issues in the process of turning his daughters, Jessica, 26, and Ashlee, 21, into sexual commodities (“She’s got double Ds!” Joe told GQ of Jessica’s bust in 2004. “You can’t cover those suckers up!”) , but sources are saying that the girls have had enough. Why? This is, after all, the man who praises the sexiness of daughter Jessica’s body, and who, a source tells Us Weekly, told stories at an MTV meeting of helping her to fit for her first bra.
Says a source who works with them, “It creeps everyone out. And he thinks he knows what he’s doing, and that he’s doing the best for his kids.”
Indeed, once a manager who had a firm grip on every move his daughters made, Joe, 48, has become a dad who can’t get his kids to give him the time of day due to his controlling and “obnoxious” behavior. Simpson insiders say the sisters are taking the reins from the man who helped make them all rich.
“Back in the day, if Joe wanted Jess anywhere he’d just order her to come – but that clearly isn’t the case now,” says a source.
What happened during a Victoria’s Secret party that left Ashlee refusing to speak to her father? What are Jessica’s friends saying about Joe? How are the sisters regaining control? For more details on this story, check out the current issue of Us, on newsstands this week.
I'm gonna have to check out Us Weekly, myself for more information. But it seems all very creepy and wrong.

Mrs. Doubtfire 12 steps herself into rehab.

People reports:
Robin Williams is seeking treatment for alcoholism, his publicist said Wednesday. "After 20 years of sobriety,
Robin Williams found himself drinking again and has decided to take proactive measures to deal with this for his own well-being and the well-being of his family," the actor's rep, Mara Buxbaum, said in a statement. "He asks that you respect his and his family's privacy during this time," the statement continues. "He looks forward to returning to work this fall to support his upcoming film releases."
Williams, 55, is currently starring in the thriller The Night Listener and will appear in the drama August Rush and the comedy Man of the Year, both due later this year.
The comic has battled substance abuse before. During his swift rise to fame on the 1978-1982 sitcom Mork and Mindy, Williams became addicted to alcohol and cocaine, he has admitted. "Cocaine for me," Williams told PEOPLE in 1988, "was a place to hide. Most people get hyper on coke. It slowed me down. Sometimes it made me paranoid and impotent, but mostly it just made me withdrawn. And I was so crazy back then – working all day, partying most of the night – I needed an excuse not to talk. I needed quiet times and I used coke to get them."
Six months before his son Zachary was born in 1983, Williams quit cocaine and alcohol – cold turkey. "No visit to the Betty Ford Center, no therapeutic support," a friend told PEOPLE in 1988. "He just quit, and he hasn't touched drugs or drink since."
What made him quit? Two events: His first wife, Valerie, became pregnant with Zach and pal John Belushi died from a drug overdose just a few hours after Williams snorted a line of coke with him at a hotel. "The Belushi tragedy was frightening,''
Williams, who is also dad to daughter Zelda, 17, and son Cody, 14, with second wife Marsha, told PEOPLE. "His death scared a whole group of show business people. It caused a big exodus from drugs. And for me there was the baby coming. I knew I couldn't be a father and live that sort of life."


Another picture where any comment from me is totally unnecessary.

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